My New Book

Saturday, May 15, 2010

so"U"l rules over the m"I"nd....

Fighting a lost cause ...keep on loosing ...win the fight...





I had it.Enough!!!I given in .I throw in the towel.I am ready to kick the bucket.
But what made me look at the world in such technicolor of  frustration,disappointment,anger and disgust ...? probably my own self...

When i look around ,my mind ,disapproving,tells me that the world is full of gross injustice.I try to justify this claim, of my brain by taking my example,ie the easiest way out to relive yourself out of misery ...to assume yourself in neck deep muck..it surely cant get worse than that,can it??? ...
                 Then i see a ray of hope that will make the pain go away ..But the ray just passes me as if i am an apparition.The colorful mirage of the waxing and waning fortunes that the life postulates is all but an well disguised prevarication.The life always takes a dip down the drains and specially when the life guard is not around.The locus of my thinking tells me that thinking about yourself if like taking a bow and arrow,fitting the arrow on the bow and firing it...hold on ..u cant see where you are firing ...neither is there any target to take down...But still you fire that salvo ..The thoughts about one existence burdens the mind...if at all we were ignorant about ourself ..if at all we only knew others..But alas...much often ..the Syllable "I" creeps in our thoughts and  rotates itself to become an "H" that signifies Help.
                           When you are winning a thing, never the thought crosses ones mind that actually you are defeating someone.And the self-gratification continues...you stamp your authority ..you take the charge ...you are motivated,excited,exalted...and what not..not a sliver of thought crosses your mind that the figure with a pointed tail,three pronged fiery weapon and two protruding summits on its head is lurking ...
                And then you are in dismay ...the world is falling over ..the ground is shaking ..your feet cant support themselves..you are disoriented ,disillusioned ...feeling of regurgitating food comes to your mind....a strange desire of having hundreds of pointed objects pierce your filthy and nauseating odour-smeared body suddenly flashes across your neural network..let the pain cease ..let the suffering vanish..let the anguish dissolve...Your entire world is in convulsions,you are feeling unjustly targeted,feeling like that goat to be butchered,feeling like that dodo already extinct,feeling like you have been "satan"esqued..
        Why ?...its the only question i ask...why we have this notion about ourself ...why we think that all apart from us have a side role and we are the main protagonist who have a special purpose to fill ...why our notion of "I" comes in our way to care for "U" ? Why our principles are jagged like the "I" rather than the accomodating curved like of "U" ?
                        The worldly pursuits drive us.All of us are in frenzy,are running a race without a finish line in sight..the goal lures us ..the line recedes away from us as we approach it...the great illusion ....the mythical mirage.It leaves a bad taste in your mouth ...to be ordinary ..to be common...to be natural...no one wants to have their first photo in paper in the Remembrances section...Everyone wants to do a fosbury flip ....
                       Are we happy ? when are we actually happy? brooding over this question ,i got only one answer..when we are praised.When we are appreciated, when we get the accolades ...we celebrate ..but are the celebrations limited to our own self ...NO...The reason as well as the effect of our praise is centrifugal in nature... We merely are a receptor of these good thoughts and we pass them on..But when we start loosing ..we crib ..and these negative thoughts are centripetal in nature ...we store them...we let them fester in our already blackened hearts ...we tarnish our soul..
                                    So what one should do...i think the only answer is to think yourself as a soul and bereft of any demands of this world yet to be able to generate praise ..for self or for others ...one should work..
But work like a bird ...free ....rising ...exploring new heights of wisdom and achievements ...treading new paths ...visiting new and unfound places in your heart...Care..for others ...for yourself....and you will see it ..the light at the end of tunnel...
       "You" are the answer ,not "I" ....
                                           BELIEVE.....  

          

Random Musings...