Sunday, May 9, 2010

The Sage Within...

Mother.Maa.Aai.Amma.Mom.....

Some adjectives and synonyms of god ...the good thing is that these names are free of any religion ,strife and politics..sheer love...
Mom ...happy mothers day...u r the best


The eternal ally of any kid ,the profound peace giver,the incessant supplier of love...The one person in my life who is the last word in love and divinity is my loving mother.Today on the occassion of mothers day ,when i write this,i fell short of words,i feel that the person i want to write about is both the means and the end herself.As i write about my mother i feel the urge to mention the sacrifices she has done for us,the love she has showered upon us(me and my brother) and many things but is it not true that i might choose to just call out her name aloud or think of her benign face and eureka! the love and affection starts flowing like a stream that has no beginning and no end.
                     Everything seems so sublime about the word "mother".The emotions that secrete themselves from the heart are not something alien.They are but the parts of my mother.Because my mother and i are one.I feel that she is i and i am her.How often i feel unnerved when she is upset and when she rejoices i feel exalted.Mother transcends the normal norms,she opens up gates of unbridled joy and affection,she is the walking brochure of god`s intent.
                                The light caress upon my hair when i had a bad dream,the concern when i am hurt,the nervousness of my results(more than me),the sheer frenzy and nerves when i am running fever,the euphoria when i succeed,the bloodshot eyes still up in my wait.....she cares...
The silky touch that is a panacea,the angelic voice that makes the fairies come alive,the eyes that search any signs of underfeeding when i come home aft holidays,the mellowed down anger that isnt anger atall,the sheer bliss of a laughter....these are all of those characteristics that by which my mother resides within me all the time.
                             Sometimes i wonder if she has a magic wand or she has a brain that is programmed to work that way or has a heart that doesnt fail to throb for her loved ones...She is the epitome of love,care and emotions.
The fact that she would wake up at 3-4 am in the night just to make you tea or that she would be your best secretkeeper or the fact that she is so efficent homemaker and so devoutly caters to every new demand of her husband or kids arent the qualities that completely and wholesomely describe what a mother is ,makes the task of writing an paean for someone who is no less than an epiphany that much more unfathomably hard.
                         When i try to see from the eyes of my mom,i see a vast expanse of emotions and a sea of unconditional energy to expend for her loved ones.The selfless eyes give nothing away but radiance that is composed of rays of care,concern,protection and pure ,godlike love.When i was a toddler and she used to play with me i must have been wideeyed,chuckling,marvelling at seeing this angel in front of me.Her whole countenance is full of life and endless pursuit to nurture.I see the whole spherical universe in her eyes,which when full of tears are nothing but the occuli of heaven.

 I want to remember how she brought me up,i want to suffer every pain that she took for me and my brother,i want to learn selfless devotion from her, i want to  take back every bad thing i did/said to her (even if unconsciously),i want to see the world through the eyes of my mother just to look whether i also look so beautiful to her as she is to me.
                As I add on few numbers in my age column, i see my mother getting old.I see the shift,i forsee the change of guard.She is the one now who needs the care,the sacrifices,the support.Though she would never say it,every mother needs her family to be there,with her.Its my turn to mother...
                    Its a honour to be a mother,for all those who are would testify that a "mother" is actually a "thermo"-meter ie the temperature regulator of a family.At hot times,during strife ,during the times a family undergoes a tough time ,she acts as a natural coolant in the engine.And she is also the fuel who burns herself unconditionally to keep her family warm and well oiled.
Her sweet voice that reminds me of the stories of the fantasyland is the connection that i have with god.When my mom takes my name,i feel that i have been granted conversation with the almightly.The diminutive avtaar of the omnipotent on the Third planet from the sun has a halo-ring on her head that filters through the maldeeds of this world and helps one to see the ethereal love that flows in our veins.
My mother taught me compassion,restraint,patience in dealing with others.She taught me to be humble and forgiving.She walked the plank with me ,supporting ,lest i fell down.She made me see goodness in people and life and to relinquish bad habits.She nestled in me the feeling of elation when someone else succeeds.
She is the mirror of my soul.When i see her,i forgive my bad deeds.I feel purged,sanctified and fearless when i think of my mother.

All these years of growing up i feel that its time that i start giving back to my mother.She has some aspirations,she has some expectations from me...I would do very well to understand all that she speaks and much more that she doesnt, and try not to fail her.But in the nutshell i fear to love her anything less than she deserves.

TO MY MOM....

You are my link to the god...I fear not if i dont worship, I fear not if i dont pay homage to the temples,mosques,altars...I fear not if i fail...
I have my mother..with me ....always...
                                                          

Random Musings...