My New Book

Saturday, May 29, 2010

Let there be light ...

A Day Without a Night to Awake...
A Night with no light today... 

I am falling.The lights fading.Everything is a blur of racing images and flying past visions of horrifying pasts.Then my mind is suddenly bookmarked to that one incident.
And i start crying ....

The mind plays tricks of its own.It kept telling me to give upon it and suddenly i received the nerve tingle to go ahead and do it.So unusual!So very bemusing!I was so close to it,i also wanted it,but i was rendered handless and possibly mindless too!The glory days were numbered,i knew it..i had a hunch.
    Starting in a retrospective mood ,my mind wanders..Am i in a dream?Is this real? can`t be..then again ..the air i am inhaling is the same,imbued with the waft of salt from the nearby sea,the sight is known,the act well versed with all the soliloquoys known beforehand as if rehearsed since eternity.Still i cant make the difference, maybe its not a dream afterall,maybe i am inside my mind only,searching ,gnawing,surfing the thought waves for that tiny known detail which will tell my disposition.
                Something wakes me from my reverie.The day is up,the night is gone,the confusion washed away, the muddled brain revving up the logical engines.I tell myself to believe it.To soak in the brilliance,to revel in the revelry,to assiduously give pleasure bouquet to my heart whilst i can.The hope hiking to the summit meets the downgoing despair.Having suddenly found my voice,i choke at the prospect.There is so much to do,have lost so much.Plethora of opportunities start mailing their curriculum vitae,but i have lost the zeal to hire.Then i know what it takes to bite more than you can chew.I was suddenly thrown into a magic box with all my wishes already fulfilled and granted.Busy as a bumblebee i start collecting trophies,i start garnering all the goodies with both my hands.
            Fortunes swing! I know about the cycle!It will turn again!But till that time let me know no limits,let me get lost,let me not know my miseries,let me be oblivious to the fallacies that have stared in my eyes with their huge mocking eyes.

         There`s no light today.All is pitch black.My eyes are rummaging in the darkness.But my heart is alit.The hope that was kindled still burns.The guiding light restrains me from putting the reins on the dark horse ,instead goading me to try the new white beast.I ask a question!I was not born that way,was I?I evolved into something alien.But the alien isnt flashing a gun,instead it is equipped with two antennas that sonar the path of wisdom.Now i am not bound.I look at myself and see a reflection that smiles back.The teeth grinding has been dealt with.Instead they let the lips part away to let the light reflect of them.
 Looking at the newfangled sun,my eyes secrete water.The sun in all its radiance is a menacing opposition.Tasting success once and calling success your staple food should logically be in different languages.The crown is a burden.The throne a bed of venemous snakes.Unleashing potential and leashing your mind over the euphoria arent exactly a recipe of a novice chef.Emmersed in all sparkle,i wait to let the humility take the shine and store it in the right place, in reserves,to be used later in times of distress.
Lesson learnt,i saunter with pride.
                      I am awoken!! not to the light, neither by the night , but to myself.....      

Friday, May 28, 2010

ThE cOdE oF lIfE tHaT gOt tHe vInCi BuRiEd In My HeArT sHiFtInG iN hIs GrAvE ...

Creativity kills innocence.Innocence if absent leads to knavery.Knavery is stencilled in a mind full of ruses.Ruses demand creativity.

The above conundrum is not logical.Neither it is making any sense.But for some people being devoid of sense is the most sensible thing.I hate to make comparisons,but i  find my sense very common in this world whereas according to this world, common sense is not very common to my senses.An artist when left with no inspiration to draw will meander helter-skelter and will bump into a mediocre rationalisation of his own thoughts that beg him to be inducted.Our mind is full of thought layers.The top layer is the layer of the rehearsed:we eat by taking the morsel via our hand(Right/Left doesnt matter) and shoving it doen our esophagus.The layer below is the layer of experince: dont let the boss know you are not working and you will be fine.The layer which is lowermost is the meditative layer,the layer of deep understanding,the layer full off blue water,the layer full of pitch black space,the layer of life code.
               Philosophically preaching to someone might not be a very good idea as we all have a deep understanding of how to decipher the meaning of a certain blip in time.But its the conscious level i am talking about here.The more enlightened we are about our ability to think beyond our mundane and moribund thoughts,the more sane we are.Mollycoddlying or spoon feeding is something that hampers growth,of the mind and of the soul.The morse code of our thoughts which in a fleeting gesture makes us cringe and in another makes us become subservient to our epicurean instincts is highly ingrained in our complex nervous filigree and demands its deciphering by constant rebuttal of negative thoughts.
        When sir arthur conan doyle gave the man from london the acute sense of grasping clues and resolving mysteries,he must have actually himself waded though those mysteries first.When we see something as complex and untenable,our natural reaction is to avoid seeking the answers.But greatness comes from seeing the simplicity in a complex scenario,seeing the word in a sentence,seeing the fading and sly smile on the face of mona lisa!Authoritative interference when coupled with our innate fear of being underprepared to handle the vagaries of destiny may render any weak(read: not awoken) soul gasping for deliverance.But the undercurrent of our life is the way we mould our clay,the underpinning question of "how we handle things,rather than how others have handled it before" if answered with prudence and enduring strength, will lead to the key of all that is unlocked.
             "Too long we have denigrated our lives,too long we have lived in darkness,too long we have groped for the unknown strands,for eternity we have fought the battle that started,raged and proliferated within our minds only".Its time that we dont bow down,we understand the understated,we let our hair down.Going by face value,we cannot look down upon those who failed in this grail quest.We all have tried to crack the code of life,some of the enlightened ones were allowed to pass in the realms of unclouded certainity,some are still left in the lurch.
                 I long to be free from the shackles of dependence on others,to be complete in my own right. I long to let my creativity flow in the glacier of unmindful and lawless brand of thoughts.To move in tandem with yourself dayin & dayout is a big challenge.Measuring my patience against my own will to break rules,i find that there is a hiatus in me achieving complete dominance over my insticts.When i create, i look for life in that creation.When a face stare at me after i have scratched my pencil for some hours,i long it to be all that what i could not be.Creativity gives us an escape route from the reality,gives our mind a narrow alley to go to and hide when confronted with harsh realities.But i like to be creative.I think ,all the time.Even when i am lost in the dark and unidentifiable territory of my dreams i am nothing but in limbo between my thoughts and my fantasies.Its like i finally get the license to go and live my fantasies without inhibiting my thoughts.    
                              Words belie! They deny us!They dont speak our mind.They are diplomatic servants.All we have to do to let them have their snake like tounge infest our hearts and fill our praise hungry mind to brim and Ahoy!! we submit..Human tounge in partnership with the lacuna of positive thoughts creates a grim situation.We should think more.Saying less doesnt help either.Our thoughts if orchestered properly are more like a waltz,albeit without a partner.We crave for a thought partner.I do!I want someone to share most of my thoughts( i cant divulge all now can I?).Someone who understands the unspoken,the unstated ,the imperceptible to others.We look for eyes with assurance,words that care,touch filled with compassion and a heart that beats in our symphony and beams with its counterpart.The outgrowth of our reach seeks new hosts to parasite.Its time we do some serious soul searching.
          Our pursue to seek solutions to all our problems and bring an end to the abberrations is a never ending one.It is the drive that we live with and if all our problems are resolved,we would better be making our way towards fire atop 4 shoulders.
Think about it!!!


Monday, May 24, 2010

Love Thy Oneself....

Palmus Autem Habet Quattuor Digitos...

We know the proportions.We know the genius that was in'vinci'ble,who drew the sculpture to be framed in a circle and a square simultaneously.Human body is a work of a greater genius.when i am writing this,i am marvelling at the coordination between my thoughts,my knowledge of language,my speeding hands over
the keyboard,and my eyes.
But i sometimes despise my body.We all do!We love to hate our frame.We perceive our body as a can full of worms, a closet full of unidentified skeletons,a home to myriad restless and uncalled for troublemongering visitors.Our such "accurate" and belittling portrayal of the greatest machine on earth begs a question.Have we fully understood the potential?have we missed the beat?have we rendered the masterpiece to become a distended caricature of itself and banished it to the Air-conditioned hallows wherein its reduced to being nothing more than a mocking souvenier of our neglect and apathy?
When i walk and there`s ample light to create the other blackened "Me",i rave about my existence.I talk to my shadow.My shadow though part of my existence cannot become part of me.It feels envious.And a playful smile makes its debut on my countenance.I know my body is not perfect.But i also love
it.No,i am not having a fit of narcissism.I am just reveling in the knowledge of my lack of knowledge about my torso.Havent seen my back in recent months,havent met the mole that resides on neck,haven`t tended to the gaping gap in my head hair that tell the tale of some stitches on my skin.But all are part.But all are me.But all are what gives me the feeling of "ME".

                              But what if our eyes can see all?what if our back spines were extended to give us flight?What if our body no longer remains a body and becomes a super structure? Wont it be nice to fulfill our fantasies.,to fly ,to capture every moment we see,to breathe in mariana trench ?I also dream.But every morning i am with my normal body,full of injury marks(was a playful kid i was!!),full of saturn rings aroud my tummy(havent excercised in ages!!),with a forehead that is a sweat factory,with a mind that thinks and writes too much!!!
Ya..But i kinda like it,being me..If any person comes to me and asks me,U r ugly ...i would say ..but you are beautiful..atleast that proves my eyes are fine and working.
But suddenly just out of curiousity, i ask my ever wondering and thoughtful mind(just cajoling it!!),what if our eyes can record every moment we spend.Every attosecond if be stored in the annuls of our fat spaghetti shaped pair of hemispheres sitting underneath the jungle of pilus,what consequences it will hold for our mundane and continuous lives?My mind is out of its processing power to answer this,as this holds endless possiblities.It will careen our legs,addle our brains ,in short will render the system unstable.If i can see the moment i was born ,wont i be horrified at being seperated from my life support with my mother?If i can see the first time i did wrong to someone,wont i feel pathetic and the first thievery act of mine surely will force me to regurgitate the nice food i just had.On the flipside,It will show me the the beautiful rains,eye-blinding gorgeous sunrises and every other beautiful moments of my life all over again.What i would like to see? the day i recieved my first star in the homework copy?the time i made my parents proud?the time i got my first toygun and when i was happy as a hyena?...Maybe!!! or Maybenot.
 I want to build muscles like Arnold,i like to run like Bolt,i want to swim as phelps does,i want to punch like tyson.Many things i like my physical form to do and achieve.But the illusion of what has been deemed as acceptable and great by our minds is deciphered very cleverly by my heart.I know that beauty lies in not only the eyes of the beholder but also in his thoughts.When i see this world`s running after hazel eyed,fair skinned,sumptuous,long legged,curvacious and sometimes bootylicious damsels,i fear at the insecurity that millions of girls the world over feel.I personally feel that the real world is what we have at our homes,rest is a facade of fake face that this feigning and frightning filled world attempts to hide under the
cover of glamour and the green paper.
They say that this body is a myth,destructible mirage,and the real solace lies in peasing the inner self,viz the soul.But since in our lifetimes,both of them are tied together why not have them as romeo and juliet rather than the Ambani brothers.Our body creates for us hunger,lust,pain...which undoubtedly are the chieftains responsible for most of the world`s unjustness.But it also creates emotions,when we feel pain,we cry..,we share other`s pain,when we feel elevated our pilous seeks attention,when we let our set of 32 shine we infuse a wave of felicity.When we work for the whole day ,sweat dripping profusely,head ringing,muscles all string taut and tired...then when we come home to the welcoming shower,to that steaming cup of coffee,to that smiling faces waiting at our homes,we feel elevated...we feel only bliss...our pains vanished...

Make your body talk ...Make your mind think ...let your soul set free...
lets be proud of ourself... and keep smiling...  

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Godly Sins::::Sins God`ed

What it takes to be god and still sin ...what it takes to be sinner and be god at it ...

I dont know the details of the struture,neither i am aware of the existence..nor i am a believer.But GoD exists,in our mindframe.In our psyche we keep him alive,in our prayers we power him with our fawning.All the time i,you and almost everyone on this green planet are trying to dial a number which seemingly has uncountable signal towers AKA the praying places,scores of providers AKA religions..but no concrete SIM.The no is busy,unreachable,switched off,out of service,on an answering m/c all at the same time for the same person.Afterall we keep on demanding more and more.Imagine a call centre employee of a customer care number listening to all the blabbering,jabbering and clapperclawing consumers with patience and solving their grievances.Thats the job profile of GOD.

     "To sin is to human ,to forgive is to god",the famous adage binds the heaven-manager to be the all pervading authority on "how to become an angel".The notion that we humans are humans afterall and hence are suseptible to sin is a convenience made by us to sin.We love to sin.It doesnt take us much convincing
to sin.We are born sinners,the only thing is the how good a sinner we are.GOD on the other hand is learning.Only a pupil..only a greenhorn...He will learn.
                             Under the able aegis of humans,the omnipotent is learning to do right things but in a wrong way as well as doing the wrong things but in a fashion that seems so right.The cloak of an ombudsman is an
illusion,the greatest deceit ever.What is an angel in the miracles goes backstage to change to being a satan of the misfortunes.Its always has been a give and take relationship and not the believed one of "man proposes and god disposes".God was there when the innocents were butchered,he was there when atrocities where committed,he was merely a bystander when the women were disrobed,children were rendered parentless and homeless.He made the atom bomb,he made the kalashnikov,he leaked the MIC in bhopal,it was his hand that cut daniel pearl....

But the point is,does he like it ?the blood,the gore,the misfortunes,crying masses,the ever spreading apathy and misery,the pandemics?He might turn out to be balance-keeper,someone who is there to take our actions in one pan and conjure another action completely complement of the same in the other.He might be neutral in his bearings.He might not be an emotional merciful lord as we project him to be,he might be just another magician who hides more than he reveals.Can we blame him then ?for all the gross injustices the world has seen and continues to see?,for all the inequalities? ,for all the immoralities?
We might not know it but as much as we despise and dole out profanities to god for not being there for us,we like to play god ourselves.We like to sin and worse we like to be god(ya not only good)at it.In a deep nook of our heart we want to rule,we want to do things that are good ,but not always!,we want to do bad things also, but not always!.Humans have traditionally been always inclined to the grand.The more the grandiose the better.The scale of doing a good deed more often than not pales in comparision with that of a bad one.And here we are talking of the sheer ruckus that a bad deed creates,the hullaballo,the commotion ,the din!The scale is big,the attraction more,hence more the chance of playing GOD.

But what about salvation,what about the final forgiveness?what about the checks and balances..the record of our sins and benignity?For whom the golden gates of HEAVEN are thrown open in welcome,and who are thrown in the fire bellied place of repent called HELL?Arent these questions are both asked and more often answered by us only?If we mull over it,we humans often make the questions that we know the answers already.The all alms giving ,nurturing,nourishing place ...the place of eternal rest and rewards ..heaven is in our heart only...The place of torture,of repent,of punishments,of a vicious demon burning bad souls in the oil of magma(as if they can be burned more !!!)...hell also resides within our human form only.The culmination of the formation and the vivid images associated with these mythical places comes from the innate fear we have about our actions.The day when we wont ask for salvation from god but from our own self,the day when we would love ourselves,the day we understand that death is just a beginning,that our life is just a rented ride ...that day we will see the universe within our own self and would cease to search for that bearded noble faced guy(not being gender bias,can be long haired serene faced lady also without any change in plot!!) more commonly know in circles as GOD.

                      Our whole existence is then governed by our own actions.We all have a piece of god within us.The god who partakes equally in the virtue and the vice.We are a small replica of the enlightened,and are again part of the great balancing act between the good and bad.In our heart is housed the be good most of the times or bad most of the times..we are the god ...of our will...of our actions.I doubt that as darkness cannot be discerped from light,bad deeds will be there and cannot be permanently squashed.But if we are able to be GOOD consistently then a time will come that we will break the vicious circle (O) of good and bad deeds and will tend towards GOD.

Every individual will continue to experience a morton`s fork...whether to be
a GOD(and sin!) or to be GOD`ed(and be sinned!)....

May God Bless you ...

PS:the above was written in jest..dont get offended and dont waiver in your faith in god ..he is always there ...just seek him within you might surprise yourself...

a gr8 story ::::

Saturday, May 15, 2010

so"U"l rules over the m"I"nd....

Fighting a lost cause ...keep on loosing the fight...

I had it.Enough!!!I given in .I throw in the towel.I am ready to kick the bucket.
But what made me look at the world in such technicolor of  frustration,disappointment,anger and disgust ...? probably my own self...

When i look around ,my mind ,disapproving,tells me that the world is full of gross injustice.I try to justify this claim, of my brain by taking my example,ie the easiest way out to relive yourself out of misery assume yourself in neck deep surely cant get worse than that,can it??? ...
                 Then i see a ray of hope that will make the pain go away ..But the ray just passes me as if i am an apparition.The colorful mirage of the waxing and waning fortunes that the life postulates is all but an well disguised prevarication.The life always takes a dip down the drains and specially when the life guard is not around.The locus of my thinking tells me that thinking about yourself if like taking a bow and arrow,fitting the arrow on the bow and firing it...hold on ..u cant see where you are firing ...neither is there any target to take down...But still you fire that salvo ..The thoughts about one existence burdens the mind...if at all we were ignorant about ourself ..if at all we only knew others..But alas...much often ..the Syllable "I" creeps in our thoughts and  rotates itself to become an "H" that signifies Help.
                           When you are winning a thing, never the thought crosses ones mind that actually you are defeating someone.And the self-gratification stamp your authority take the charge are motivated,excited,exalted...and what not..not a sliver of thought crosses your mind that the figure with a pointed tail,three pronged fiery weapon and two protruding summits on its head is lurking ...
                And then you are in dismay ...the world is falling over ..the ground is shaking ..your feet cant support are disoriented ,disillusioned ...feeling of regurgitating food comes to your mind....a strange desire of having hundreds of pointed objects pierce your filthy and nauseating odour-smeared body suddenly flashes across your neural network..let the pain cease ..let the suffering vanish..let the anguish dissolve...Your entire world is in convulsions,you are feeling unjustly targeted,feeling like that goat to be butchered,feeling like that dodo already extinct,feeling like you have been "satan"esqued..
        Why ?...its the only question i ask...why we have this notion about ourself ...why we think that all apart from us have a side role and we are the main protagonist who have a special purpose to fill ...why our notion of "I" comes in our way to care for "U" ? Why our principles are jagged like the "I" rather than the accomodating curved like of "U" ?
                        The worldly pursuits drive us.All of us are in frenzy,are running a race without a finish line in sight..the goal lures us ..the line recedes away from us as we approach it...the great illusion ....the mythical mirage.It leaves a bad taste in your mouth be ordinary be be one wants to have their first photo in paper in the Remembrances section...Everyone wants to do a fosbury flip ....
                       Are we happy ? when are we actually happy? brooding over this question ,i got only one answer..when we are praised.When we are appreciated, when we get the accolades ...we celebrate ..but are the celebrations limited to our own self ...NO...The reason as well as the effect of our praise is centrifugal in nature... We merely are a receptor of these good thoughts and we pass them on..But when we start loosing ..we crib ..and these negative thoughts are centripetal in nature ...we store them...we let them fester in our already blackened hearts ...we tarnish our soul..
                                    So what one should do...i think the only answer is to think yourself as a soul and bereft of any demands of this world yet to be able to generate praise ..for self or for others should work..
But work like a bird ....rising ...exploring new heights of wisdom and achievements ...treading new paths ...visiting new and unfound places in your heart...Care..for others ...for yourself....and you will see it ..the light at the end of tunnel...
       "You" are the answer ,not "I" ....


Tuesday, May 11, 2010

"CRICKET=Sachin tendulkar...hence proved!!!"

Sachiiiin...sachin...sachiiiin ...sachin...sachiiiin...sachin..

And the chant goes on.And he plays on.21 years...Still playing,winning hearts,bringing glory,tearing opposition apart,tonking fours and sixes,making the streets look as if they have a curfew,this special boy(at heart) from mumbai is none other than the "little in strature,big on heart" Mr Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar.
Its like i have grown with him,watching him play,rejoicing when he(and if thats the case,more often than not,the team) does well,cursing when he fails,keeping his records for him(not possible now,the numbers are too huge and the records piling),feeling proud of the man when an honour is bestowed upon him etc.Like me,he has touched the life and times of many worldmen(great people arent property of one nation),has inspired many toddlers to risk a muscle strain in picking up that extra heavy bat,has lead to a tremendous loss to the exchequer by having all people not working but watching him play instead,has set the adrenaline pumping by his deft touches and equally brute force.Imagine the game of cricket without a certain little master!!!

 Several times it has been recounted how he scored a duck in his first ODI innnings and how he staved off a bloody blow to his nose and chose to continue to bat in one of the tests.The fabled story now immortalised was just the start of many more such accounts of sheer courage,determination,and willpower.Many a times this 5`5 foot tall gentlemen has stood tall to scale insurmountable summits,many a times batting with pain he has batted as if the pain was the drug he needed to play on,many a times he has made seemingly gargauntan tasks look like innocuous.And the best part of all this is that he has done all this with the utmost decency,modesty,humility and thus has become a sports icon to look upto.Pointing at a flaw in this gentlemen`s attitude and his passion notwithstanding his strature as one of the most fair players the game of cricket has ever seen is like finding a needle from a haystack.

The way he has decimated the opposition over the years in the most mercurial fashion,the way he has transformed the record books into his own biography,the way he has made the game of cricket into a game that captures the imagination of the young and the old is the same way that this great son of india leads his normal life.Immortality comes to him naturally.
All the accolades accrued to this so called "thorn in the flesh" of the bowlers the world over are nothing but the results of the dedication,passion and unmatched pride for playing for one`s nation.When he scored that gritty and unshakable half century against pakistan in his first series,people knew that something special was lurking behind the innocuous facade of this 16 years 205 days old chubby boy.And when he scored that marvellous first test century vs england at old trafford,the talent had  finnaly arrived.The boy now firmly in the vision of the cricket fraternity as one of the young shining stars,alongside a certain carribean genius to be ,proved his mettle beyond his age when he scored that sensational century against the aussies at the tearing fast wicket of Perth.The boy had really arrived!!!

 Records tumbled ,bowlers`s hair line receded ,crowds swelled in the grounds as this little master started mayhem.After the tests it was the turn of the one dayers.After waiting for about 72 matches ,he scored his first ton.But his destructive prowess at the top of the lineup was a legend even before that.The ODI world cup in 1996 proved to be a showcase of his immeasurable talent.The tournament tough a dud for india,took sachin to new echelons.Still owen young, this curly haired genius from the back alleys of dadar was now a senior and un-severable member of the indian cricket mix.The english season in 1996-97 which also saw two modern day greats in sourav ganguly and rahul dravid donn the indian blue test cap for the first time,was abuzz with the talent of this man from mumbai.
Next monumental period in sachins career came in the year 1998.In line were the aussies who were tryin to tame the subcontinet elephant but were caught unawares by this lion from the indian den.Shane warne nightmared,sachin sweep slogged;mark taylor bowed head,sachin raised his bat.After trouncing the aussies in the tests,sachin showed his class in the sharjah tournament where once again he proved to be juggernaut for the men from down under.      
                                   With the aussies again visiting india in 2001 ,this time with 16 test wins in a row,they were again stalled by sachin`s century in the chennai test.Remembering Chennai,who can forget the tale of sachin crying after failing to bring india home against pakistan after scoring 136 and India felling agonizingly 17 runs short of a famous win over its arch rivals.
The year:2003 ,another world cup ,another scintillating performance by Sachin.
These mention of great innings cannot be complete without the mention of sachin`s 241 against australia at SCG or his truly majestic 169 against South Africa in one of the leanest summers for indian team.Such Innings by him are aplenty.But as the saying goes, where resides the genius the brickbats follow.
                               The Tennis elbow....the term now immortalised as something that rendered sachin powerless, a lion without tooth & claws, a task hitherto thought impossible by normal events.The performance faded ,so did the people`s memory,they started criticizing the player ,his technique,his temperament,his attitude(that was by greg chappell,cant believe he said it!),his longevity(manjrekar,kapil dev,ian chappell suggesting he take retirement),his failed ability to lead( only blot in otherwise a spotless career),his ability to score runs quickly and what not.They said that the old sachin was gone..was thing of the past...was a shadow of his previous self...was being now unwillingly towed by the team as a inanimate log.The criticism escalated to burning of effigies,stone pelting,criticism related to his other financial commitments...but the worse of them all and undoubtedly the one where sachin would have felt the needle was the booing he got from his home ground crowd at wankhede.

                                   The elevation of other players like sehwag,ponting also paled the old veteran in all eyes.The genius was forgotten,the crowd called for the head of their hero....
But as Michael Holding says on TV in his famous carribean accent "Form is temporary,class is permanent"...Sachin roared back...Ala re ..sachin ala re..
The spectre of failure got dissolved in the bright light of hope.The Ghost was back from the shadows to haunt the bowlers the world over.Scoring the only 200 in one day cricket is testimony to the qualities that the man possess to keep changing himself,his ablility to adapt.

Then came the IPL...the 2010 edition brought to the fore the short version of genius.The fickle format of 20-20 also gave in to sheer class and masterful strokeplay of sachin.His trademark check straight drives(on and off),flowing cover  drives,Ferocious cuts and pulls,elegant flicks on the legside,backfoot punch of good length balls,improvised paddle sweeps ,towering sixes...all were on display.The audience were captivated,although he couldn`t take his team all the way,he reminded s that this 37 years he still is a force to reckon with.
                    In many ways sachin tendulkar has been a talisman for indian cricket.Cricket and sachin enjoys a relationship as spice to curry,butter to parantha,romance to relationship,pureness to gold,common sense to intellect.He brings that fervour to the much so that wasim akram quaked to abdur razzak once.."tujhe pata hai tune kiska catch chhoda hai " much so that glenn mcgrath appeals for a shoulder before wicket to get him back to much so that he is akin to god in cricket...The comparisons with sir donald bradman is just a eulogy to the aussie great.

        Who had known at the time when sachin and kambli were involved in that then world record partnership that this fragile looking boy would go on to make the bowlers chew their nails,scratch their heads,legends of the game sing paeans and become the prized scalp for cricket lovers the world over.Tweeter introduced,he became a rage there also ,garnering 70000 followers in jut 2-3 hours.

Anil kumble on track to pick up all 10 wickets in a test match hands his cap between overs to sachin...for luck..we are extremely lucky that a certain Dennis Lillee suggested sachin to throw away the red cherry and pick up the wooden slab in his formative years ,otherwise we would have been deprived to see the greatest show of cricket on earth and would have  missed the incarnation of GOD himself....

1 fan to other during a tight match :::
 "arre ..abhi to bahut ran banane hai yaar ...india haar jaayegi shayad ..."

other says with pride and confidence....
"chinta mat kar ...abhi sachin baaki hai .."

Sunday, May 9, 2010

The Sage Within...


Some adjectives and synonyms of god ...the good thing is that these names are free of any religion ,strife and politics..sheer love...
Mom ...happy mothers day...u r the best

The eternal ally of any kid ,the profound peace giver,the incessant supplier of love...The one person in my life who is the last word in love and divinity is my loving mother.Today on the occassion of mothers day ,when i write this,i fell short of words,i feel that the person i want to write about is both the means and the end herself.As i write about my mother i feel the urge to mention the sacrifices she has done for us,the love she has showered upon us(me and my brother) and many things but is it not true that i might choose to just call out her name aloud or think of her benign face and eureka! the love and affection starts flowing like a stream that has no beginning and no end.
                     Everything seems so sublime about the word "mother".The emotions that secrete themselves from the heart are not something alien.They are but the parts of my mother.Because my mother and i are one.I feel that she is i and i am her.How often i feel unnerved when she is upset and when she rejoices i feel exalted.Mother transcends the normal norms,she opens up gates of unbridled joy and affection,she is the walking brochure of god`s intent.
                                The light caress upon my hair when i had a bad dream,the concern when i am hurt,the nervousness of my results(more than me),the sheer frenzy and nerves when i am running fever,the euphoria when i succeed,the bloodshot eyes still up in my wait.....she cares...
The silky touch that is a panacea,the angelic voice that makes the fairies come alive,the eyes that search any signs of underfeeding when i come home aft holidays,the mellowed down anger that isnt anger atall,the sheer bliss of a laughter....these are all of those characteristics that by which my mother resides within me all the time.
                             Sometimes i wonder if she has a magic wand or she has a brain that is programmed to work that way or has a heart that doesnt fail to throb for her loved ones...She is the epitome of love,care and emotions.
The fact that she would wake up at 3-4 am in the night just to make you tea or that she would be your best secretkeeper or the fact that she is so efficent homemaker and so devoutly caters to every new demand of her husband or kids arent the qualities that completely and wholesomely describe what a mother is ,makes the task of writing an paean for someone who is no less than an epiphany that much more unfathomably hard.
                         When i try to see from the eyes of my mom,i see a vast expanse of emotions and a sea of unconditional energy to expend for her loved ones.The selfless eyes give nothing away but radiance that is composed of rays of care,concern,protection and pure ,godlike love.When i was a toddler and she used to play with me i must have been wideeyed,chuckling,marvelling at seeing this angel in front of me.Her whole countenance is full of life and endless pursuit to nurture.I see the whole spherical universe in her eyes,which when full of tears are nothing but the occuli of heaven.

 I want to remember how she brought me up,i want to suffer every pain that she took for me and my brother,i want to learn selfless devotion from her, i want to  take back every bad thing i did/said to her (even if unconsciously),i want to see the world through the eyes of my mother just to look whether i also look so beautiful to her as she is to me.
                As I add on few numbers in my age column, i see my mother getting old.I see the shift,i forsee the change of guard.She is the one now who needs the care,the sacrifices,the support.Though she would never say it,every mother needs her family to be there,with her.Its my turn to mother...
                    Its a honour to be a mother,for all those who are would testify that a "mother" is actually a "thermo"-meter ie the temperature regulator of a family.At hot times,during strife ,during the times a family undergoes a tough time ,she acts as a natural coolant in the engine.And she is also the fuel who burns herself unconditionally to keep her family warm and well oiled.
Her sweet voice that reminds me of the stories of the fantasyland is the connection that i have with god.When my mom takes my name,i feel that i have been granted conversation with the almightly.The diminutive avtaar of the omnipotent on the Third planet from the sun has a halo-ring on her head that filters through the maldeeds of this world and helps one to see the ethereal love that flows in our veins.
My mother taught me compassion,restraint,patience in dealing with others.She taught me to be humble and forgiving.She walked the plank with me ,supporting ,lest i fell down.She made me see goodness in people and life and to relinquish bad habits.She nestled in me the feeling of elation when someone else succeeds.
She is the mirror of my soul.When i see her,i forgive my bad deeds.I feel purged,sanctified and fearless when i think of my mother.

All these years of growing up i feel that its time that i start giving back to my mother.She has some aspirations,she has some expectations from me...I would do very well to understand all that she speaks and much more that she doesnt, and try not to fail her.But in the nutshell i fear to love her anything less than she deserves.


You are my link to the god...I fear not if i dont worship, I fear not if i dont pay homage to the temples,mosques,altars...I fear not if i fail...
I have my mother..with me ....always...

Saturday, May 8, 2010

The Factual Surrealism...The Overt Reconnaissance...The World 'Eyjafjallajokul'ed


I venture out.I brave the elements.I dare to look into the sun.
Thats audacity!!!Such confidence comes from purity.The venerable nature just handed out to me the greenest brochure of mother earth.Everything is so
serene,so simple,so full of life,so beautiful.The green grass invites me to have a nibble at the fresh droplets of just laden dew.The tall trees incite the bird within me to touch their apex.The dusty roads mottled by patches of overgrowth of motley of sherbs run along.The mysterious canopies of shade made by the overhanging specs of clouds waylay me as i drive.
               I drive to the gratification of senses;I drive to conquer the eclectic elements of nature;I drive to the satiation of the eternal hunger.The need ,the want of being nurtured,being pure!All my senses are crying out in
unison to come aboard.The chirps of the parakeets,the buzzz of the bees,the hoot of the peacocks are the things that will accompany me, they will be my accomplices as i prepare to venture beyond the realms of hardhitting absence of an utopia.
                    But something`s changed.The atmosphere around me suddenly turns foggy.The air becomes dramatically heavier.My vision blurred,i adjust my frame of reference.And then i see it .The monster,the satan who has taken the movie to a completely new set is visible to my tear laden eyes now.It is me!!!

The human being that was being chained,restrained was somehow let loose.And now in its full venomous mood is spewing forth noxious fumes and contaminants.
Suddenly i am afraid.Suddenly i am feeling a struggle starting between my ears.Then there is this horrifying slideshow of human acts that had me repulsed and left me unhinged.I looked upon the venom spewing snake aka factories,the horror initiator claws of the sawchain cutting,the hobgoblin that is the restraint on the rivers...and i feel a shudder!!! A cold swooped down and enveloped my senses,now they are numb,they are lifeless...
                      And a volcano erupts,and a flood surges, and a earthquake rocks...The mayhem is there for display,the pandemonium is rife,the havoc is running...The entire system is crippled...a nightmare...a incubus heavy on our minds.

        My mind goes back to the nerves that were tingling and communicating when i was a youngling.The essense of being immaculate, of being virgin in your thoughts,of freedom of any compulsion to react to your environment...that smell!!! I felt aerated..the cool breeze laden with the waft of the wet earth and the salt from the ocean hitting and filling my nostrils making me feel drugged.Just looking aimlessly at the different patterns getting dynamically created among the clouds would make the clock turn 2-3 times.The overhanging clouds swelled with water,pinned on the sky as if hanged from their tail,threatening me with their imperious thunder and darkened hues would keep me in their awe.

            I miss those days of tryst with nature,being in the lap of nature leaves you pockmarked with peace.Now the dragons and the beasts of the concrete jungle are the only things that one finds and they are devouring the innocence and soul of our nature.
                                     But still all`s not lost.The actions that are reactions to our any future actions are the harbinger of the complex consequences that our nature has to face if we are not careful.So the glaring
differences between the two visions that one can have, is actually a very thin line.The brumous gap between the two extremes of beauty and the beast is narrowing and the need of the hour is to make efforts to stilt the marshes and seed the plowes.


Friday, May 7, 2010

Let The Match Begin ....

Roger vs Nadal :::: Rafael Vs Federer
Match Point no 4 ...Lights fading….flashes of the cameras blinding the eyes..
A fan shouting here and there ...umpire saying "quite please"...a forehand kisses the net and another body kisses the ground at virtually the same moment in time. This was the time 2 years back at Wimbledon when Rafael Nadal kissed or rather Bit the Gentlemen's Singles Trophy at the all England lawn tennis club. When the champion shook hands with the new incumbent, all eyes were on the future of tennis. This was because nadal had proved he was no flash in the pan, he was not only the red clay cladded warrior but is  also a grasshopper that is equally adept at predating the mighty of the greens.
                        Nadal is a fantastic athlete. There are no two ways about it. The way he has pushed federer out  of his comfort zone over the years is amazing ,coz we are talking about a player that has a over 230 weeks at the top of the pile of men’s tennis. Everything you notice about nadal leaves you imagining a ambitious, inspired and a ferocious competitor. The very fact that roger was doing so superlative stuff in mens tennis once thought to be the bastion of power servers inspired the Spaniard from Mallorca to become the player that he has become.
                         When you draw a mindmap of Nadal aka 'Rafa', the very peculiar routine that he goes through before the start of the match like keeping the water bottles stacked, and while he serves like that picking of his shorts, or the guttural "VAMOS", his flexing biceps, his accoutre, his superstitions between points ,all of these are acts that release a unique energy on the court which is unmistakably contagious. His venomous forehand ,lethal slice ,baseline deep passes all coupled  with blistering speed across the court, uncanny anticipation with the sprinkles of indefatigable energy and that vicious high bouncing top spin makes for the complete treat for any tennis lover.
                       At the  completely opposite pole of the sphere of tennis artistry sits the champion. FedEx as he is called, delivers all the dreams of a fan who appreciated aesthetic beauty. He is all about grace, flow, sleekness, technique. He doesn’t has a "trying too hard" bone in his body. A complete natural, federer has over the years through his unfathomable and now fabled talent made complete no work of some of the most illustrious players of the years. The aggassies ,the peters, the hewitts all were humbled. And when i say humbled they were outclassed! Some of the patent and fearsome traits of federers game like his perfect and stinging forehand, his amazingly accurate crosscourt and down the line passes, his flick of the wrist backhand, if are on display at the start of the match ,then the opposite players know it is nothing but sound of the death knell for them. The sight of federer in full flight is like watching a pelican gracefully caressing the ocean waters while 2 inches above or like an unputdownable book that doesn’t cease to amaze. The most difficult task for fedex is to be a better player.. as there’s not much scope for it.

                                        But one thing that stands out of these two tremendous athletes is the way they carry themselves. They display all the traits of a sportsman viz  humility ,grace and respect for each other as players secondly but human beings first. They both truly represent the union of two great players by chance thrown in the same era to entertain, inspire and enthral the audience the world over. Their duel is like watching the constant human conundrum of picking one between brain and heart, neither can live while the other dies, both are perfect complement of each other and are also good friends.          

Before the advent of rafa, federer was "the federer".Unstoppable like an raging bull, he was billed to be the "untouchable" player of his era. But Rafa changed  the game and how !! He challenged the champion with skills that were at best complement to those of his foeman. Flummoxed ,vexed, outplayed ,federer seemingly wasn’t able to solve the puzzle ,he looked completely off colour; he was completely at a loss. Match after match he seemed to abdicate his ability and will to win ,giving points and  thus matches easily to even unheard of players was nothing but the stranglehold rafa had on him ,mentally and emotionally. A volcano was bubbling inside federer`s calm exteriors. He was traumatized!!, being forced to take the lower podium was never a choice for him. 
                Meanwhile rafa raged on,trampling player after player, with his seemingly inexhaustible bout of energy ,he looked like a giant the mere look and presence of whom was good enough for a talented player to throw in the towel. Winning  all that came his way, he started replicating the dominance federer displayed just 2 years ago. People hailed the new king and rightly so ..They wrote off the old veteran and very wrongly so.

                    The tears were not of joy!! They were painful!! They were of extreme disappointment!! they came from the painful experience of being second best when your are so close to being touted the all time best. But they washed away the fear, the tears at the Australian open no matter how much ridiculed by his critics world over, served him a great  purpose. They made him believe himself to be vulnerable.
                 The tide had turned, the fortunes changed, federer was back!!                                   
The great story at Roland Garros the very same year made for a romantic comeback that for a change had all fans of fedex in joy-tears. And the win at Wimbledon stamped him the greatest tag ,rounding off what was an heroic riposte and one which only he could have pulled off.                 
In no way all this time was rafa was on a slide, he was unfortunate being injured. But having watched, admired and crooned for both of them i feel the joy of watching both play to their full potential is an experience beyond thoughts. Its no use having a pressurised Roger playing against a rampaging "VAMOSed" Nadal. Neither it is any fun watching an injury hindered rafa struggling against a "Resurrected" Federer.
I want to see Roger Federer Vs Rafael Nadal!! 

Random Musings...